Fibromyalgia. One word, five syllables. The truth I had been searching for that I knew existed all along.
A decade of doctor's appointments, specialist consults, foreign physicians, late nights reading medical journals and endless days thinking I was insane finally lead me to this. It was real, others had the same symptoms.
I first heard the word from a gynecologist in the UK. My birth control was running low while I lived in the South of England so I booked an appointment at a sexual health clinic. Since I was foreign, they wanted my full medical history before I was given a prescription. I chuckled and apologized to the nurse for the long story I was about to tell her. She sat with me for almost half-an-hour as I regaled her with all the main issues I had and what procedures I had undergone. When I was finished, she thanked me and took the report she wrote to the gynecologist. When the doctor came into the room, skimming the report as she sat down across from me, she made an off-handed comment, "Have you ever been tested for Fibromyalgia?"
The sentence would open up a whole new world of research for me, but I hadn't connected the dots yet. I responded to her inquiry in the negative and she said I should speak to my general practitioner about getting checked out. I agreed and that was the end of it for the time being. I didn't have a family doctor in the UK and I was focused on relationship issues I was having with my partner at the time. Still, the word stuck with me. The next time I had a moment to myself I started to look up the symptoms and signs. It had no known cause, no cure and mostly effected women. This was disheartening, but all I wanted was an answer. As I continued my research, everything I read just felt like I was reading my life story. It felt like I was a typical case and I had no idea how this had been missed previously. That's when I noticed how little it was recognized back in North America. It wasn't until recently that doctors started to believe patients and consider fibromyalgia a real condition.
On my return to Canada last summer, I was determined to get my diagnosis. The only problem was I didn't have a family doctor because mine retired while I was abroad. Clinic doctors were wary of giving referrals to specialists, which I needed to confirm that it was Fibromyalgia. So I set out to organize a new family doctor for myself only to discover there was a shortage of family physicians in my province. I also had a bunch of paperwork to fill out and file after returning to the country. By the time I had managed to sort everything out and get an appointment with a doctor who was willing to take me on as a patient, it was a full year after I learned of the condition from the gynecologist. The symptoms first seriously reared their grotesque head when I was 12-years-old. After I booked the appointment, I turned 22. Ten years of seeking a diagnosis had passed and I was so broken down, I thought there was no fight left in me.
Sitting down with my new doctor, explaining everything to her and then bringing up what I knew of fibromyalgia...It was nerve-racking and it honestly took the last of my mental energy to do. I had waited so long, suffered for so many years in the dark. I wanted, no, I needed to hear an answer to my question, "What's wrong with me?"
Walking out of my new doctor's office with her agreement and her pledge to help me further investigate my issues, was so liberating. I could not have been more relieved. One journey, the search for an answer, had come to an end. The next journey, the search for a working a treatment, was just beginning. Ten years of fighting for an answer has prepared me for the next battle, and I'm ready to take on the new challenge. I welcome it.
Dana~
"Do you or a loved one have fibromyalgia or CFS? How long did it take to get the diagnosis? When did the symptoms first start? Tell me your story in the comments below."
